I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
