You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
