There was a lot of him and a little penis
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
He's a Shit stain on my heart
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
we're so committed to being not committed
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
We need to feng shui this bitch.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
