Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
