thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
