check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize