Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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