My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
