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i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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