Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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