white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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