garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
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