I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
