id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize