Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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