Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
