But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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