The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Randomize
