Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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