That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
