4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Randomize
