Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
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