I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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