return my video game
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I think I sprained my soul last night
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
