But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
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