I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize