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• (317): View more from Indiana

  I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home

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• (516): View more from New York

  any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.

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• (831): View more from California

  No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.

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• (818): View more from California

  The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.

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• (337): View more from Louisiana

  Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...

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• (646): View more from New York

  You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did

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