dude i'm inner monologue high
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
either way he was missing a nipple.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
