Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
