Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
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