whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
