last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
