he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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