Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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