I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
