It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
