Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
