I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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