so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
my shit smells like andre
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Randomize
