talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
