that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Randomize
