You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
