On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
