ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize
