alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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