im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
