I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
