your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
