I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
