Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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