if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
