Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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